Small Town Girl

After a dedicated 1.25 years service to one of the oldest firms in Kochi – KGSA, I’m shifting to a new firm - INSPIRATION from coming Monday. YAY, lil excited. But “The million dollar question” – still remains unanswered!!

It literally is about a million dollars. When I started job hunt last year, the personal questions that interviewers would ask were not many. They were all the usual ones with typical answers. Positive points, negative points, strengths and weaknesses. Typical HR speak. Now that I have worked for more than a year I have *finally* managed to push myself in the ‘assessment of my market value’ whirlpool, the questions are again typical. But somehow I have still not been able to conclude what the best answer should be. One should always be prepared not to be caught unaware. I thought, with practice, I’ll be able to conclude the answer to that million dollar question – why do you want to leave your current job? But time and again, the reactions of the interviewers perplex me.

You should not appear as a flyer – changing jobs as quick as maybe clothes... Well ok, maybe not, maybe as quick as toothbrushes. So at least no flimsy reasons. The first approach I decided was to be honest. ‘More money’, I would state blatantly along with the usual, by now rattled-off-my-tongue kinda practiced sentences. After all, we all know that, that *is* the main reason. I soon realised. One of the best architecture firms in Kochi, had an interview with me. They asked me the reason why I wanted to shift and I stated the above, though of course coupled with a lot of other stuff about challenges at the workplace, growth, work culture et al. They never got back to me. In discussion with one of the consultants, who happened to know the philosophy behind the elimination process of this particular firm, I was made aware of the fact that ‘money should not be the main reason’. In fact you should not sound ‘greedy’. ‘But that’s a major reason why we all seek change, isn’t it?’ I asked. Still. That’s what he told me. Well, don’t know why I shouldn’t demand what I think I am worth. If its too high, may be we can negotiate, but at least I should be made aware.

I started concentrating on other issues. Like growth for example. Role enhancement for another. If I say I am not getting these at the current workplace, the next question automatically is whether I ever raised this issue with my bosses and what was done about it. If I say that I did and nothing was done about it, that perhaps gives a wrong idea again. May be about my performance. May be about my relationships with my seniors. May be about my competency or my persistence. Whatever. To say that I never talked to my bosses regarding my problems would be foolishness. I give different answers based on how I perceive the interviewer to react.

Another point is work culture. If I say that there were some things that I didn’t like, the interviewer tries to probe into what kind of things. Ultimately it boils down to the same things happening in all offices. Does that imply that I’ll never be able to adjust to the work culture of any job? If I give a slightly positive picture of the work culture then we come back to square one. Why on earth would I state work culture as a reason for my shifting if it’s quite commendable?!

There’s a fixed trend according to which people’s priorities change. When one’s a fresher, one is very enthusiastic and is ever willing to take on all the menial tasks and even do it for free if asked! But as you grow, things start getting to you. People realise that the company shouldn’t get to have its cake and eat it too, all the time. Priorities change.

But the million dollar question still remains unanswered. If I ask for a hefty (ok, not so hefty) salary, is it ‘bad’? Negotiation or feasibility are other things. But mentioning that I am in this thing for money, is it really the wrong move? I don’t think so. Not all people survive on the usual idealistic criteria for a dream job. Good work and good work culture are all passé, out of date. What matters today is the big bucks and the time that you get for yourself. Good work and hence work cultures are also very important, but I have seen people reach a compromise with them, as long as the other two criteria are getting satisfied. Is that approach wrong? 0_o

I silently aged another year yesterday. Yes it was my b’day but didn’t feel like it at all. Surprisingly, I had a tendency this time to almost forget abt it. I had to consciously remind myself that my b’day was approaching. I have always been good with dates (that would probably be an understatement according to some of my college friends) and I remember and wish people on time. I used to make a lot of efforts to make the birthday baby’s day special, if it was someone close but not anymore. Ahh I miss the good old days so so much. :(

Many of those who are in my age group, would agree that ageing another year, or rather your birthday is no great day, nothing to look forward to as you try to battle with that sinking feeling that you are getting *old*. There was a time, when birthdays were a big deal. As a child one keeps waiting to quickly grow up and get out of school. Once there, you yearn to grow up fast and be independent. No rules and cash that is your own seem like nirvana. “Been there, done that”, leads you to this stage, where I am in no hurry to grow any older than what I already am.

It only translates into one word – PRESSURE. Pressure to grow more be more responsible, pressure to earn more than that glamorous girl in your office, pressure from parents to get married and once that would happen pressure to produce some kids coz all this while your biological clock is ticking away. It’s just not in sync with you, you who keeps trying to make yourself believe that you are still young at heart.

Slowly but surely, it has changed from a time to think of what all you want to do ahead in life, to counting and feeling miserable about what all you *still* could not get done. I spent half of my previous year feeling aghast that I was going to turn another year older in a couple of months. No more of that. Someone said life begins at 40 or was it 30 or maybe it was 23. Who cares?

I spent last Friday with my lil cousin bro making placards that were to be taken in a rally from school to spread awareness about protecting trees. World environment day just went by and the irony of all times, I chanced upon some public service ads in the newspapers about a year back which mentioned that the public can get saplings of trees, free of cost from the forest department nurseries (this is to encourage plantation of trees). What they did not mention was the location, phone numbers of those nurseries or even how to go about the whole thing. The most intuitive way to find out was to Google it. After some searches I did land up on the phone numbers and locations of the nurseries (with most of them being wrong numbers) but it wasn’t very useful.

I also learnt from the forest department webpage that I had landed on, that felling any tree, anywhere, is illegal and one needs to obtain permission for it, according to “Tree Preservation Act” I certainly think that hardly anyone is aware of this rule since tree felling is as common as pest control! Even for lopping off some branches, one needs to fill up some forms and seek permission. Come winters and everyone is lopping off branches of the bare minimum trees in India (of course without permission)! Only in the case of emergencies when a tree is hindering life, traffic or property, can the tree be felled first and then reported.

What’s more, there’s even a tree help-line. One can even complain against the illegal felling of a tree. Now that’s some more gyaan.

Talking of tree help-lines and world environment day, is anyone aware of any bird help-lines? There’s a family of house sparrows living in the verandah at my granny’s house. Every day one or two chicks drop down from the nest and die (probably because of the heavy rains). Some of them break their legs and face a slow, painful death. Apart from trying to give them some grains, water, milk and a makeshift cardboard house, I couldn’t do much. If anyone is aware of some such thing like bird shelters (on the lines of dog/cow shelters), please let me know. Let’s contribute back to our environment before we are left getting nostalgic about how things were “back in old days”!

okay this topic becomes a part of my blog on this day because of the latest bollywood song from the movie Rajneeti that has the exact same tune of "vande mataram", the lyrics go like..

"boodha aasmaan,
dharti dekhe re..
dhan hai dharti re,
dhan dhan dharti re..."

And the irony - I heard the "Vande Mataram" just few minutes back on the radio, heard it after ages on AIR. Not the AR Rahman pop version but the old world, slow and gentle version that we used to sing in the school assembly. In fact Rahman’s version is not really the Vande mataram that I am talking about. It’s interesting to note how the same lyrics, set in a different backdrop of melody evoke different feelings. The Rahman version is pop patriotism, more josh than the older one, asserts our patriotism with gusto. The old one is sober, and puts me at ease, calms me down. It’s more about cherishing what you have instead of asserting it. May be because I associate it with that security that childhood provides. It also reminds me of waking up to the strains of the sarod in the early hours of morning, coming from the radio, which my grandma would be listening to as my mom would simultaneously go around rushing to get me ready for school. There’s a third version too, which belongs to some black and white movie. This one also has josh but of a different kind. More to do with anger, revolution and “get out of our country” feelings. This one’s not often heard.

I remember thinking when I was a kid, that the wordings (if not the exact ones then some derivatives) of Vande Mataram provide a good means of traditional, unique sounding names to eager parents waiting to name their babies. Shubhra, Jyotsana, Pulkit, Yamini, Phull Kusumit, Drumudul, Shobhini, Suhasini, Sumadhur bhashini..Shasya Shyamalam..

So many ancient names! Heh.

Lizzies have always been around, haven’t they? But somehow in the past 1 or 2 years, I have come to know them at a ‘closer’ level, which I suspect is closer than most people are privileged enough. They are always there, hanging by the ceiling or camping on the wall, staring at that dinner (aka mosquito) on your head or you – you never know and may never want to either. The moment you flicker on a light, and there’s a movement in the room, trust loyal Lizzie to be there. Three days back I managed to step onto a baby Liz after not having switched on a light. I was so repulsed by it all, that I kept hopping for 2 days after that (till yesterday, I hope I don’t toray), as if it was still somehow in contact with my footwear. I soaked my footwear clean and got rid of the no-lights-please-i-am-expert-at-playing-dark-room habit pronto. My orthodox relatives gave me a bigger shock by their reaction to the incident. Sympathy can be expected. Disgust even. But if one shares such misfortune with someone and gets a question back at that, asking something as ridiculous as “Which foot was it?”, one can’t be blamed for looking as stunned as lizzies themselves. I was told by my relatives that depending on which foot I crunched the Lizzie under; it could be auspicious and hold different meanings. I just wish they got as lucky as me.

When I was in my granny’s house here in Cochin long back I thought I would have no neighbors because of low occupancy in their colony. But I was wrong. I had Lizzies for company. One even landed on my lap once as I tried relaxing in the verandah on a hot summer night. To say that I had springs attached to my behind would be a mild way to express the swiftness with which I got up. As expected I developed a habit of not sitting under the ledge anymore and I look carefully whenever I am near the porch. I tried being optimistic by thinking that at least they would help in some pest control by eating up the free hotel business setup by the mosquitoes. But no, they only ended up befriending the mosquitoes, the spiders and the rest of the gang. I can see them having their frequent picnics up there till I drive them out using a broom! Now they have started playing hide and seek and turn up when I least expect them. The only thing missing is the ‘boo’ or something.

Then there was this ‘bright’ one (Do they have any brains?) which made me think and rethink my opinion about them. There was this Lizzie who for some reason developed an affinity to not only my invertor but a particular spot on that. Day in and day out I saw her perched right there, always holding fort. I could not understand the reason for it. Neither was the invertor too hot nor too cold. In fact it was the same temperature as anything else. I made my maid agitate her outside the house using a broom. As soon as that happened I immediately locked my fortress and left for my work place. No prizes for guessing what happens next. Brilliant Lizzie was inside when I got back home. From where she penetrated the fortress I call home, I wouldn’t know. And of course as always she was right on the hot seat – that particular spot on the invertor. Do they have brains or what?! Not only did the lizard know the what and the where with such clear granularity, she also knew the how! No matter what I tried, she seemed to be stuck (not just with those vacuum pads they have for feet) to the same spot on the invertor. If I knew some variant of Parsletongue, I would have surely questioned her. Some days later she left as silently as she had appeared with a very “Woh kaun thi” type of aura left behind her.

If you dear reader, haven’t already been creeped out, I will take the risk of describing yet another profound encounter. One fine day, while driving with dad, suddenly something loomed up large on our windscreen. Thankfully I didn’t swerve, considering that I was almost about to have the kind of reaction one has while watching 3D films. A big fat lizzy was right there on our windscreen right in front of me. Not only did it stare at me right ahead, it also did the disgraceful act of ‘flashing’ (not to forget the free lift it got)! As if the vision of something of this species appearing out of nowhere, that too while driving isn’t enough, there was the extra revulsion due to the feeling that it was about to land right on me somehow. The thought of switching on the wipers sickened me even more thinking about the bloody consequences. With all that difficulty, I somehow kept my eyes on the road and hands upon the wheel. After reaching where I had to, I got some much needed respite.

Be they creepy or be they brainy, I just hope their motto in life is not Kabhi alvida Na Kehna. :D

Night here. And it's raining. When the weather is wild outside and I am at rest in the dark, that is when I sleep the best. Listening to the earth's rhythmic lullaby. So I'm off to perform a good night's sleep and some deep, quiet dreaming. Nite nite.

Amul chocolates – a gift for someone you love, Thums up – happy days are here again, Goldspot – the zing thing, sipso – soya milk, Uncle Chips, Gems, Maggi, Chauraha, Hum Log, Tamas, Trishna, Ek do teen chaar, chitrahaar, rangoli, antakshri, Discovery of India, Mile Sur mera Tumhara, He-man (I have the power of the universe), Spiderman, Mickey mouse, Donald duck, Uncle Scrooge, Pluto, Goofy, Chip and dale, Tom & Jerry, Superman, Captain Planet (the power is yours), Swat cats, Pokemon (gotta catch ‘em all), Dexter & Dee Dee, Heidi, Card captors, Small Wonder, Kahani ghar ghar ki, Kasauti zindagi kii, Sanjeevani, Kyunki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi, Star Trek, Rishi Kapoor, Dharmendra, Amitabh Bachhan, Parveen babi, Neetu Singh, Jayaprada, Sridevi, QSQT, George Michael, Michael Jackson, Boy George, Sam Fox, Wham, Boney M, Beatles, Carpenters, “Those were the days”, “Summer wine”, “Que sera sera”, piano, needlework, clay modelling, Cochin, Aurangabad, Chennai, Mumbai, BSA, Lady bird, Kho-Kho, Dog and the bone, Dodge ball, Stop and party, Marco Polo, Treasure hunt, Barbie, Monopoly, Uno, char sau bees, ghulam chor, napoleon, Tetris, Mario, duck hunt, contra, tank wars. akkad bakkad bambay bo, hide n seek, pakdan pakdayee, lock and key, chidiya ud, inky pinky ponkey, “one two three you go free”, “Tumhee ho maata, pita tumhee ho”, “Hum honge Kaamyab”, “Vande Mataram”, “Kadam Kadam Badaye Jaa”, “Jana gana mana”, Class monitor, Gandhi house, Nehru house, Tilak house, Tinkle, Champak, chacha chaudhary, Amar Chitra Katha, Tintin, Reader’s Digest, Archie, Richie Rich, Enid Blyton, Sydney Sheldon, Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys, typhoid, fracture, jaundice, VHS, VCR, Digjam, Vicco Vajradanti, Tata ka OK, Godrej hair dye, Bombay Dyeing, Onida, Texla, Binatone, Binaca geet mala.

That was a snapshot of my childhood. How was yours? :D